Relationships
When you have great relationships in your life you will be happier. Whether it is your partner, your family or your friends you will always need to work and improve those relaWhen you have great relationships in your life you will be happier. Whether it is your partner, your family or your friends you will always need to work and improve those relationships. Many often take them for granted and thWhen you have great relationships in your life you will be happier. Whether it is your partner, your family or your friends you will always need to work and improve those relationships. Many often take them for granted and this can lead to complacency.is can lead to complacency.tionships. Many often take them for granted and this can lead to complacency.
Here are my top tips to develop a great relationship
· Don’t monopolise the conversation – make it about the other person.
When you monopolise the conversation you are making it about you. As soon as you do this the other person will start to drift away and lose interest. Your aim should be to listen more than you speak. If you think of the conversation as 100% between you and the other person, you should aim to listen 70% of the time.
We have all met people who talk endlessly about something that is of no interest to us and others who just monopolise the conversation and make it about themselves.
· Show an interest in the other person.
Ask the other person open-ended questions.
When you ask questions it shows you are interested in the other person and helps them to connect with you. Ask about family, friends and jobs etc. An open-ended question is a question that does not need a yes or no answer.
Ask them an open-ended question about something that you notice about them. This creates a better depth in the conversation. Show interest in this person and find out what interests them. Ask someone how they think or feel about something that they are talking about.
Pay them a compliment and give positive sincere feedback.
· Be present and attentive when listening to somebody.
The key word in the previous sentence is present. Listen to what they say without interrupting or thinking how you should respond. Listening well strengthens a relationship as people feel that you care.
Actively listen to the other person. I have met people who are talking to me and they look as though they are listening but they have that faraway look in their eyes, you know they are not listening but thinking of something else.
If you struggle with active listening practice on your family and keep tryingWhen you have great relationships in your life you will be happier. Whether it is your partner, your family or your friends you will always need to work and improve those relationships. Many often take them for granted and this can lead to complacency. to bring your mind back to the present. With practice you will get better.
· Be understanding and compassionate.
Good relationships require compassion and understanding for each other. Using perspective, try to understand where the other person is coming from even if you have a different opinion. Talk to them from the heart in a calm and kind way.
You can say something like, “I really understand why you are so frustrated and why you are upset. What can I do to help?”
· Spend more time with the person.When you have great relationships in your life you will be happier. Whether it is your partner, your family or your friends you will always need to work and improve those relationships. Many often take them for granted and this can lead to complacency.
Spend extra time with the person that you want to improve your relationship with. Work around their schedule and meet up for a meal, go for a walk together. The fact that you are trying will make a difference and hopefully improve it.
Lorraine’s last minute advice
Don’t get angry, remain calm
Breathe deeply
Don’t judge, don’t blame
Walk away if you are getting angry
If you want more help with your relationships I can provide personal coaching.
